A fabulous career, great style, a beautiful family… Can women really have it all? By Afua Adom
There isn’t a week goes by that we do not see images of yet another celeb body snapping back into shape after having a baby and taking approximately four days of maternity leave before going back to their TV show/singing career/reality-TV appearance/whatever. As we choke on our All-Bran and exclaim, “She didn’t just have a baby?!” we are reminded again that yet another woman is supposedly having it all. But what does that even mean? What is this “all” that we should be aspiring to have? Well, it’s the holy trinity of great family complete with designer hubby, a fantastic body with wardrobe to match, and an amazing career, earning loads of cash. You have the work/life balance completely nailed, you never have a hair out of place
or a child covered in jam. You have it all.
Weight Watchers success story Jennifer Hudson is having it all with gorgeous baby David, an equally handsome husband of the same name, a newly discovered six-pack and a role as Winnie Mandela. Michelle Obama is having it all with the world’s most famous address, the most enviable arms ever, the cutest kids and a job as the first lady of the United States – her qualification being her super-intelligent husband and a law degree to boot.
But why do we need to have it all? Why is there this immense pressure on women to juggle everything in order to fulfil an often-unattainable ideal?
Georgina, 27, a hairstylist from London, says, “I don’t think women can have it all, and I don’t think we should have to. Why do I have to have a career, a family, a husband and feel like I have to look amazing, too? It’s too hard!”
Pauline, 38, a housewife from Bolton, says, “I’ve never felt the need to have a career. My ‘all’ is my family, my beautiful home and my great body. I am so busy looking after my kids and husband and making sure my house looks great in between gym workouts and yoga sessions, that that’s a full-time career in itself. I don’t need or want a job.”
On the other hand, 31-year-old personal assistant Laura from Edinburgh says that women can have it all – indeed, it’s their job to do so. “We shouldn’t expect men to be the sole carers of our
kids or the sole providers for our families. We should do our bit, too. I went back to work six months after having my baby.
I love my job and running my home, too, but I feel that I have to look a certain way. It’s not easy, but it’s my lot in life. I’m happy that I can choose to have it all. Not every woman can.”
The reality, of course, is that there is no right or wrong. The key is to make a decision and
to be happy with your choice. Whether you choose to go down
the superwoman route of having it all or concede that you can’t do everything, be content with your choice and don’t succumb to any kind of pressure either way. If you don’t want kids or a career, don’t have them. But if you do want the family, career and looks, go for it, girl! Whatever you do, just be the best and believe in your choice. Don’t let any celeb, or even the woman across the road, make you feel you’re not good enough.
